So, why is that the easiest way I relate to men is sexually?
I might not answer that question within this text.
The most awkward situations for me have been when I meet men who genuinely have no desire to bed me, or at-least have the decency to “get to know me” before attempting to bed me. I know that this sounds as though I’m full of myself and under the impression that every man wants me. That is not what it is.
What this is, is a confused young person who has no idea of what life is outside of the bedroom. I mean, how can a man look at me and not picture me nude, or imagine what it would feel like to caress my skin? That, along with bearing children, is my purpose. Right?
Unless a man is talking to me about business, we have nothing to discuss but sex. What else am I to think, after growing up knowing that I’m not allowed to go out at night because I will be raped.
The reason I will be raped when I go out at night is because me are out at night looking for sex. Men are out during the day looking for sex.
[Essentially, men get better labels than I. I’ll take mindless-sex-slave over
whore any day]
How am I to relate to men as friends when “intellectual conversation is boring” and “you can’t be talking about such when we’re out here having a good time”.
I am interesting only when I’m being quizzed about my “fantasies” and “what’s the freakiest/naughtiest thing you’ve ever done”
So, again, how am I to be no more then walking sex when this is what I’ve been told I am?
I thought about that, while considering the various reasons for my path to feminism, and achieving higher consciousness; I wondered what it would feel like to not be sex.
The idea was terrifying. I mean, all these years, sex has given me the idea that I am more powerful than the male species. Where will my power come from if we’re playing evenly now? Legs closed and zippers up- what would be MY advantage?
It’s quite obvious that it would NEVER be an even playing field, it is “A man’s world”.
I thought about how my relationships with most men could be considered shallow,
but they always get me what I need when I need it, sexually and otherwise. What more am I looking for?
How is NOT having sex, or as the society prefers, how is not
whoring around going to improve my life?
[If] I did decide to cut connections with the gentlemen in my rotation, I [would] have no one to do the following:
1. Bring me chocolate when I’m feeling down and craving for some
2. Massage my belly when my period pains become unbearable
3. Answer the phone when it’s 2am in the morning and pick me up from where ever I happen to be stranded at the time
4. Listen to my super lame jokes and not pretend to laugh
5. Have sex with me
After uncovering the reasons for having these people in my life, I realize that the only way to replace them is to make friends.
And that is a long process.
It takes longer to make friends who are close enough to perform the above duties than it does to rock a man’s world so good and have him be that friend for a few months.
Why complain about being treated as a sex object and then continue to behave like one?
I AM NOT A SEX OBJECT.
What does it even mean to “behave like a sex object?”. This idea that I am no more than sex because I’m getting mine needs to be removed from your minds.
Having sex does not define who I am as a person.
Not having sex does not make me a better person.
With that said, I announce now that I may have found my kind of feminism. The feminism that advocates for women’s right to be all the sex they want and not be
labelled nor shamed by this hypocritical society we live in.